


In And Out Of Consciousness

by intoapuddle



Category: Glee RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-26
Updated: 2013-05-26
Packaged: 2017-12-13 02:08:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,240
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/818706
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/intoapuddle/pseuds/intoapuddle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Chris and Darren share a night of interrupted sleep.</p><p>PG because there are mentions of sex. Some pre-event jitters.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In And Out Of Consciousness

When Chris first awoke, he acknowledged Darren's arm draped across his bare back. He acknowledged Darren's sleeping face snuffling into the crook of his neck from behind. He realized that the position they were in, with Chris on his stomach and Darren half-lying on top of him and holding him even though he was still unconscious, was a place he'd rather not leave for the coming decade. He cracked one eye open. The blurry digits on the alarm clock on his night stand read 2:50. Chris didn't have time to smile his victory before he fell back to sleep. He had an entire night left for sleep. He had an entire night left to be held close by Darren.  
  


*  
  
 

The next time Chris woke up, Darren and him had shifted. Chris was shivering from cold, so he opened his eyes. Darren was lying on his side, facing away from Chris, wrapped in a cocoon of their sheets and a comforter. Chris, on the other hand, was lying in a fetal position to gain some sort of body heat from himself. His first instinct told him to pull the covers to himself and kick Darren in the shin for snatching all the warmth. But on second thought, that wasn't going to end nearly as well as Chris crawling closer to Darren and making room for himself under the sheets, and wrapping his arm over Darren's chest. When the skin of Chris's arm first touched Darren's stomach, Darren stirred in his sleep and a low whine escaped his lips. Chris smiled to himself and caressed Darren's chest and stomach a little, making his body heat spread to Chris. It worked. Chris sighed contentedly. Mmh. Warmth.  
  


*  
  


The third time Chris awoke, he was startled out of sleep. The ghost of the gripping terror in his chest made him breathe hard, and his eyes opened for the pure purpose of assuring him that he was in Darren's bed, safe and sound. He swallowed and released a nervous breath. He hadn't been that deep inside a nightmare in a long time, and the fact that the fear was still putting a pressure onto his chest and nestling deep within him only made it accelerate. By now he was on his back, and Darren's head was resting on top of his chest. This was Chris's favorite position, because it enabled him to card his fingers through Darren's hair and watch his face as he slept. And then Darren looked up at him, eyes puffy and gaze sleep-addled.  
 

“Whuswrong?” he murmured.  
 

Chris's heart wanted to break from affection and fondness for his boyfriend.  
 

“Nothing.” Chris's voice sounded surprisingly clear and awake. “Just a nightmare. Go back to sleep.”  
 

“Nah,” Darren said, and he fit his chin on top of Chris's chest to look at him better. He tilted his head. “Poor Chrissy.”  
 

“It's okay,” Chris whispered, but the way Darren looked at him as if his fear was the most important thing in the world got to him and tugged at his tear ducts.  
  


“Could feel your heart beating like crazy,” Darren said. “In my sleep. Then you jumped and I woke up.”  
 

Darren let a hand skim over Chris's chest gently.  
 

“You sure you're okay?” Darren asked. His voice got clearer as it came back to him.  
 

“Yeah,” Chris nodded. “I don't even... remember what it was about.”  
 

Darren's eyes closed, and the corners of his mouth curled upwards.  
 

“Let's go back to sleep,” Chris whispered. “Come here.”  
  


He took the hand that was still caressing his chest and pulled it with him as he turned to lie on his side, with Darren safely draped behind him. Darren settled comfortably into being the big spoon and Chris pulled the covers over both of them.  
 

“It's okay, Chris,” Darren whispered, and his voice was dragging so bad it made Chris think he had already fallen asleep. “I'll hold you.”  
 

Chris fell comfortably to sleep by that reassurance.  
 

*  
 

By the fourth time Chris woke up, he was seriously getting sick of waking up all the time. Him and Darren were still in the same position as when they'd fallen asleep last time, and as Chris squinted to make out the digits on his alarm clock, and they read 4:20. Only about two hours had passed since he woke up for the first time, and it unsettled something inside of him. This night was a little too long. Chris had originally been comfortable with knowing how much sleep he had left, but now it was making him a little bit nervous. There were thoughts lurking at the darkest corners of his mind, and they threatened to make themselves visible if Chris didn't get to sleep through the rest of the night in comfort.  
 

Chris's hand linked with Darren's unconscious hand on his chest, and he gave it a light squeeze. He petted the back of Darren's hand with his thumb, drawing small patterns and rhythms there to keep the anxiety at bay, and it worked. He breathed better now. He hadn't even noticed that that had been a difficulty before his lungs started to open up and allowed air into them again. He released a sigh of relief. Maybe he'd get to sleep through the night after all.  
  


*  
 

Five. Five times Chris was shaken out of sleep before his alarm went off, and Chris would have been angry about it if it wasn't for the fact that the reason he woke up this time was that his boyfriend was scattering kisses onto his throat. They were back to the position of Chris on his back and Darren on his chest. All Chris could see was the mop of curls that shielded his vision of the room. All he could feel was the soft press of Darren's pillow-soft lips pecking the skin of his neck. There was nothing sexual about it. No electricity, no heat stirring in the pit of his stomach. It was just a firm, assured pressure that made Chris's chest and heart fill and flutter with fondness.  
 

“Dare?” Chris murmured eventually.  
  


Darren retrieved, steadying himself on his arm next to Chris so that he could look him in the eyes. Darren didn't say anything. He leaned forward and grounded their lips close, Chris's bottom lip between Darren's lips. Darren sucked a little bit, and a happy hum vibrated against Chris's mouth. Darren pulled back a little and tilted his head.  
 

“I just felt like doing that,” Darren slurred, voice affected by sleep. “You're a gorgeous boy, Chris.”  
 

Chris's chest swelled even further with affection for the man hovering above him.  
  


“Sleepy Darren is verging dangerously close to Drunk Darren territory,” Chris grinned. “Did you just get up and take a shot?"  
 

“You're confusing me with an alcoholic,” Darren said. “All I am is... A Chris-oholic.”  
  


“Getting up in the middle of the night to kiss me,” Chris mock-scolded, shaking his head disapprovingly. “Get your life together, Darren."  
 

“It's so hard,” Darren whined, and nuzzled his cheek next to Chris's forcefully.  
 

Chris laughed soundlessly and grabbed Darren's hair, pulling him back gently.  
 

“Push through it, baby,” Chris said. “I believe in you.”  
 

Darren just whined again, fighting against the restraints of Chris's hands in his hair. They both hid chuckles behind their lips. They were equally as aware of just how ridiculous they were acting.  
 

“Did that intervention do nothing for you?” Chris asked, voice distressed. “All those letters from friends and family...”  
 

“Just admit it,” Darren growled. “I'm not the only one here with an addiction.”  
  


Chris made a shocked face, mouth shaped into a perfect 'o' and eyebrows shooting high on his forehead. Then his brows furrowed sadly and he whimpered,   
 

“Okay. Okay, yes. I am...” Pause for effect. “A Darren-oholic!”  
 

Then he let go of Darren's hair and Darren practically fell on top of him, lips on Chris's. Chris pushed onto him, hands grasping at his bare back and pushing into the skin, keeping him close. As they parted Darren released a hot breath onto Chris's face. It turned Chris on a little bit, but he was too tired to do anything about that now.  
 

“Did I just dream that?” Darren asked, and then he laughed a ridiculous donkey laugh.  
 

Chris laughed as well, mostly because Darren sounded like an idiot.  
 

“No, you actually are that stupid,” Chris said with a teasing grin.  
 

Darren made a face.  
 

“Takes one to fuck one,” he said and shook his head, and Chris laughed so hard his cheeks hurt.  
 

“Oh, God,” Chris said through the convulsions of his laughter. “Ouch. I don't think that's how the saying goes.”  
 

Darren kissed Chris's smiling mouth, and they calmed down from the weird burst of energy that had appeared between them for a few minutes. Chris was suddenly reminded of just how sleepy he was and when Darren put his head on his chest again he yawned. Darren followed it by yawning himself, and Chris sighed.  
 

“You don't have to be nervous, you know,” Darren whispered. “It's going to be fine.”  
 

“Yeah,” Chris said. “Can't believe you're saying that to me, though.”  
 

“Well, it's about both of us,” Darren said. “But I admit I've had some trouble sleeping tonight.”  
 

“Shh,” Chris murmured. “We're fine.”  
 

Chris's hand went to finger through Darren's hair, an act of reassurance and presence. He hummed a little bit. There were those thoughts again, those thoughts that he knew that if he thought them he wouldn't get another second of sleep tonight. And he really did need the energy of a good night's sleep to deal with what the next morning would give. So did Darren. And Darren yet again proved to be a lot better at the act of calming down, because he was breathing long and even onto Chris's chest again. He was already sleeping. And the knowledge that Darren was calm and sleepy enough to drift off made Chris comfortable, and he drifted out of consciousness just minutes later as well.  
 

*  
 

The alarm clock woke Chris up by its shrill, unforgiving sound. He managed to roll out of Darren's embrace, turn the sound off, and roll back into Darren's arms before he remembered their nightly endeavors. He smiled a little, despite of being grumpy in the morning, when he recalled the skit they'd randomly played out just for the two of them. The smile turned into a worried expression as soon as he remembered just what the day had in store for them, though. He swallowed hard, and nudged Darren in the shoulder. Of course Darren's sleep wasn't bothered by a loud alarm clock. He was a former college kid. He suffered through getting accustomed to his roommates' separate alarms enough to not be bothered by _any_ alarm clocks now. At least, that was his excuse. Chris secretly suspected that Darren was just lazy.  
 

The nudge made Darren stir awake though, and by the expression of his face he went through the same range of emotions Chris had the minute he awoke. He let out a small groan and sat up on the bed next to Chris. Chris yawned sleepily, and Darren rested his head on his shoulder.  
 

“So we're coming out today,” Darren said, just to say something.  
 

“Ugh, not again,” Chris groaned.  
 

Darren sat up and looked at Chris. His hair was in a weird just-woke-up shape with curls springing out wherever they felt like, and his eyes were swimming with sleepiness. He smiled, though.  
 

“This time you're not alone,” Darren said.  
 

“Because you're here with me,” Chris sang, and Darren rolled his eyes.  
 

He leaned in and kissed Chris's cheek.  
 

“We're going to do it well,” he said. “Subtly. People are already freaking out that we're actually doing an interview together.”  
 

“Yeah,” Chris said. “It's going to be a blink-and-you'll-miss-it kind of thing. Just like mine was. It's fine.”  
 

No one was going to blink, though. No one was going to miss it. Darren took Chris's hand and smiled. Chris smiled back.  
 

“I love you,” Chris said.  
 

“I love you, too,” Darren said.  
 

It hadn't been easy to get through the night before making the announcement that Darren and Chris were dating. There was a lot at stake. Even though they tried to tell themselves it wasn't a big deal, none of them were really fooled. Darren's career was going to take a turn. So was Chris's, even though he was already an out gay man. But this was a decision they had made together, a long time ago. They'd been a couple for two years now, and by the way things were looking now they were going to stay a couple for many, many more. Keeping that away from their professional lives when they have to face media every single day wasn't worth it. If the world was going to change, they had to help it on its way, no matter the personal repercussions.  
 

And they had each other. Darren gave Chris's hand a light squeeze, and they got up to shower and get ready. For every possible outcome of the announcement, they knew they wouldn't get rid of one another in a long time. That was the comfort. That was the final push. And they'd get to spend many more nights together, side by side. Cheek to chest. Big spoon and little spoon. As long as they still had that, they were going to be just fine.


End file.
